vote or die

hiiii everyone. can you please take 2 seconds out of your life to vote here @ Navigator MD, Inc.

it would mean a lot to me, you'd be supporting my dad & brother's new company! 

good karma. pass it forward. xo.

do whatever you want

hello people. quick post because my computer's about to die & i left my charger in Nashville, HOW WILL I EVER SURVIVE!!! couldn't. thats why i am going to the apple store right after this... anyways i made it back to los angeles last night. it feels so good to be back, which mean i will be back into a normal routine & posting all day err day! 

happy friday loves. do something for yourself, you deserve it. xo.

ballerina bun

this has been my go to hair do lately. i've been an on the go kind of gal & i just don't have time for my hair... not to mention it is so freakin long. hair cut needed. throwing it in a bun right after i post this & off to run errands in beverly hills. xo

burned in the back of my mind.

 do you know what sucks? when you desperately try so hard to erase someone & you just can't do it.

 no matter what you do, or how happy you are, there are those certain people that burn in your mind. and  you can't help but wonder why?

 why are they still racing through my mind? there must be a reason for it...

 i sure as hell haven't figured out what to do when that happens. because, trust, it happens to me a lot.

 but all i know... is right now, in this moment, all i can do is live my life for me. 

whats on today?

happy superbowl sunday, i am attempting to give a fuck... it's not working. so therefore i shall blog.

oh & go packers. green & yellow. green & yellow....

that awkward moment when...

always free.

 i just felt like rambling so here we go, oh but first a photo shoot because i have after 20 years learned how to curl my hair. i know, it's a proud moment for.

okay thanks for wasting your time. well currently in nashville: snow has become a very normal thing. which is really not normal. because as long as i've lived here we were lucky if it snowed once! so it's kind of amazing, i feel like my home town has been turned into a winter wonderland this past week :)

however that does not mean i could ever live in a snowy place because i still hate cold weather. i HATE being cold. but i love winter clothes. so i mean, you win some you lose some.

other than that, i'm really enjoying my time in Nashville. it grows on me, even being from here, because when i return after being gone for almost years, i realize how great it is to be from here. life here isn't simple, but compared to LA, it is extremely simple.

and people are nicer... and i think my southern accent (or whatever accent i have) is creeping back in... OH NO my acting teacher is going to kill me!

but yeah, life is good right now. it was so amazing to see all my friends from high school & such over the holidays. most people think they leave high school and move onto their college friends, but i've learned for myself that my best friends in the world come from home.

okay, off to Rumours East (a lovely wine bar in east Nashville) to meet my angel of a mother. stay beautiful. xo.

confessions

1. I discovered Summer Heights High a long time ago, and it still never gets old. neither does quoting it daily...

2. my parents forced me and my siblings to take piano lessons when we were younger. we were all way too distracted to focus so our teacher had to bribe us with the "prize of the week"... and now i regret not learning. i wish i could play.

3. i've had a crush on joseph gorden-levitt since he was on "10 things i hate about you"

4. i hatee the freakin jonas brothers... however, i am possibly the last person to catch bieber fever,  after watching his live performance of  "pray" at the AMA's

5. i think jesse eisenberg is a brilliant actor and i have always loved his work. he finally got the recognition he deserves for "The Social Network"

6. i go through phases of feeling "defeated" and doubting myself... like who am i to think i am good enough to want to pursue acting? who am i to dream big? --- but, i think that it is one of the first steps toward success. and i keep on trying.

7. i think Lady Gaga is playing the biggest joke on the music industry. i think she is just really good at keeping a straight face. she is aware of the fact that she is wearing a meat dress or a 20 ft glitter thing on her head. shit we can all walk out with meatloafs on our heads and walk around like "i am the shit, i am an artist."

young hearts

why hello darling. miss me? yeah didn't think so.

well reason being for my lack of writing has been school-- i eat sleep sit in traffic & go to school.

recently @ my acting school: i am working on a kissing scene from Picnic, working on the song "I don't know how to love him" & learning the Charleston in movement!

it's been really fun and busy... the other 2 classes (Alexander Technique & Voice and Speech) are more paper work and self work

i've been doing well in school, except the fact that i keep getting in trouble ha-- but for making people laugh, i don't know. its really stupid.

"Every artist was first an amateur."

Ralph Waldo Emerson

other than aada, i am still counting down the days til i move to west hollywood.
& i'm not going to lie, i have felt some of my insecurities creep back in recently. it's hard to live in LA and not to compare yourselves to others-- especially when you're at an acting school.
i need to stop. breathe. and re-focus on myself and tell myself that i am good enough. that i don't need to look or act like any other girls at AADA, because no one can be me, so i need to remember the beauty in THAT.
easier said than done. but also it just gets old meeting new people... wait that sounded wrong. i love meeting new people. but it's about time i have a solid few girlfriends and i honestly don't have that here.
i get along better with the guys in my class, but thats also different because i still need my girly time... AND OF COURSE, i want to meet guys that i am actually interested in and don't just want to sit and goof off together in class with :)
but i will just let time take it's course. because there comes a point where i need to give myself a break, because what? i moved here in July and started up with a whole new class in September.. i'm just impatient. i want results now! just like i want to be going on my own tv show.... cricket. cricket. too much? ha alright, got it.

but seriously, to anyone who reads this remember that you are beautiful and no one else in the world is you. so do what you will with that. xo. dream big