you know there's something beautiful in the feeling of defeat... sometimes its okay to let your guard down and have that moment of breathlessness. struggle. pain. because it's part of life, and it's part of the journey.
& during these moments, you become stronger. you may not feel like it for a while or see the light at the end of the tunnel, but sometimes when you get pushed to that point you come out as a fighter.
it may hurt like hell, but you realize what it is you have been wanting for so long, and despite the fears and the failed attempts, you never EVER give up. you have the choice to walk away. but you don't. you keep fighting.
you come back better and one day your passion will succeed the others. one day you will have your dreams. i believe we can control much of our future, it's not about luck, heart means everything.
... well that's how i see things recently. life is unpredictable. it's too dangerous to go according to plan, because that's not plausible. life will keep throwing you in all sorts of direction, and you can't avoid it. no one is bulletproof, or perfect, or completely put together. we are all human, so don't let others fool you when they act is if they don't care. everyone cares about something or someone to a certain degree.
everyone has their own way of putting up walls. and what i've learned is just how to cope with my own. i'm not looking for anyone to fix me or figure me out. i am learning how to be strong and honest with whats real. don't ever let anyone tell you how you should feel. don't fall into that trap, just remember to always trust yourself.