My Blog List

Jul 30, 2010

DAY 1- Favorite song.

okay i had to add another playlist of my current favorites because it was driving me crazy! EEEK i love music way too much. enjoy. xxxx

Create a MySpace Playlist at

DAY 01- What is your favorite song? um well....
Sorry, I have been busy so I haven't had time to start the 30 day challenge. but I have been thinking back to songs I use to love & still love.
so i really don't know what my absolute favorite song is... so i made a playlist of 24 of my favorites! haha that's not cheating or anything...

Jul 27, 2010

playlist #4

Hiiiii. so i should be posting more music... i just made a very mellow playlists for nights like tonight when i have a lot of work to do and just want to relax. most of the songs are fairly old, but still great.

A girl who reads my blog sent me a 30 day song challenge.. it seems really cool so i told her i would post it. here are the first 15 of the 30. I will start it tomorrow, so be checking back. now listen to some sleepytime music at the bottom of this post. xxx

Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds of you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that reminds you of a certain event
Day 08 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 09 - A song that you can dance to
Day 10 - A song that makes you fall asleep
Day 11 - A song from your favorite bandDay 12 - A song from a band you hate
Day 13 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 14 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 15 - A song that describes you
without music, life would be way too quite. i use lyrics to define my life.

ranting is fun.

here comes this feeling i find impossible to explain. as if my world is spinning and all i need to do to escape is to write. i never know what i am about to write or what it is i feel the need to say.
but more than not i often find the message i have been searching for if i just let my mind take over. in an extreme comparison it feels like an anxiety attack. like fuck, i must be sharing these thoughts.
i think i'm a bit over having terribly high highs and terribly low lows. it comes in shifts and it's exhausting. i was thinking on my drive home from venice-- that i slightly think "talent" is bullshit...
i think that we have so much more potential then we realize. yes, some people have more talent in certain areas than other, but who is to tell me what i am good or not good at? i say there is nothing wrong to start something you wish you would have done or maybe JUST now realized you wanted to do. (ex. for me= i WILL learn how to play the piano and guitar, when i have time...)
i think if people tell you that you just don't have the talent that you should tell them to fuck off. because after all, we are all humans. ha okay i struggle a bit with authority over me, but sometimes it's just like dude, really? do you remember when you were young? and when the world was your playground and you didn't have it so figured out then either...
but at some point, i find that people gain bad qualities with success. if you achieve something after working so hard for it, wouldn't you want to share it. wouldn't you want to help people? i mean i would.. so i will leave this train of thought with this: you control your own life, you really can do great things in your lifetime. get off the couch, put down the bong, and go out and live in the real world.
i have got to do a lot of work right now with my character analysis/memorizing lines/ memorizing my song, but i have a lot of stuff i want to post later & i have gotten some suggestions that i am going to take on. xxx

ps. yes you read that right, memorizing my song. I HAVE TO SING A SOLO FROM LES MIS TOMORROW AND I'M TERRIFIED. but i won't let anyone know it. meeeeer.

daily dose of inspiration..

last post then going to bed. i have a lot of quotes that i want to share... & right now i REFUSE to care anymore. i refuse to take thought in petty shit. this is my life and i am owning up to where i want it to take me. so let's forget the past and live for the now. sweet dreams.

"I’ve learned that people will forget what you say to them, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you make them feel."

"Take a good look at the people around you. They all have a story to tell. Wether it be short, long, amazing, or horrible. Everyone has a story. No one. Is boring, no one."

"Damaged people are always dangerous because they know they can survive."

"Beauty gets attention, but personality gets the heart."

That's the problem with us. We're

both stubborn asses and always want

to get our way. We both hate to be

wrong and love to be right. But that's

the thing about love. No matter what

happens, we always come back for each

other, one more time.

-The Notebook

"I hate that feeling when your mind does not agree with your heart"

"I wish there were a rulebook for intimacy. Some kind of guide to tell you when you've crossed the line. It would be nice if you could see it coming, and I don't know how you fit it on a map. You take it where you can get it, and keep it as long as you can. And as for rules, maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you have to define for yourself."- grey's

"You can only be young once. But you can always be immature."

Jul 26, 2010

i'm just sayin...

"Sometimes pain becomes such a huge part of your life that you expect it to always be there, because you can`t remember a time in your life when it wasn`t. But then one day you feel something else, something that feels wrong, only because it`s so unfamiliar. & in that moment you realize you`re happy."

my mind has been wandering a lot lately... i'm happy and i'm sad. i'm inspired and i'm confused. i love change but i hate it. i think i put too much pressure on myself sometimes to do well here. &honestly, things so far are really great.. but i always have a millions thoughts and new ideas and i just want to scream sometimes, or shut off my mind so i can relax.i believe that sometimes we all lose track of what really matters in this life. we can get so distracted every single day, and my hardest battle is fighting them.

"You must never compare yourself to anyone, except from the previous you."

i believe that everyone struggles. but that sometimes we need to give ourselves a break. you are never going to be someone else. so be a person you are proud of. and when you do beautiful things, take pride in that. and when you get lost, find yourself back to your inspiration.

"Trouble is part of your life. If you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to love you enough."

as you can only imagine, i have encountered some very veryyyy fake money oriented air heads. and i am just hoping that i will meet people who have their head on straight. people with passion and desires. because i need those people in my life to keep me sane.
the good thing about stressful times here are my acting classes. it is my art. my therapy. it saves me.

"look at all the people around you and realize that every single person you see is struggling with something,

and to them, it’s just as hard as what you’re going through."

the truth is life is never going to be perfect. but it can always be worth it... i believe that you need to hurt sometimes to remind you of how lucky you are when you are happy. i believe the mind has more power than you could ever imagine. i believe that missing someone when they are sitting right next to you is the most terrible feeling in the world. i believe that sometimes you cannot understand anything, but that if you hold on to your faith that all the pieces will fall in place... eventually. & lastly, i think i need to stop pretending i'm okay when i'm not. stop pretending i don't miss someone when i do. stop pretending like i don't care when it's all i think about. stop pretending that i know what i'm doing when i am scared to death.

"The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be."

haay, it's okay....

HAAYYYYY, IT'S OKAY... let's just chill out and relax.

it's okay to sleep in your makeup after one too many drinks.

it's okay to complain about breaking out AFTER sleeping in your makeup...
it's okay to be a girly girl and a tomboy... at the same time.

it's okay to love with all your heart, even when you hurt like hell.

it's okay to be 20 and not know how to cook... me? never...
it's okay to not want to learn how to cook, and be fine with living off cereal in opposition to learning how to cook.

it's okay to change your mind after you experience life a little more.

it's okay to press ignore on your cell phone all day because you just don't want to talk to anyone.
it's okay to pretend you have a good sense of direction, but then get more than any of your friends.

it's okay to wake up and sleep walk straight to the coffee maker.

it's okay to believe that the $5 coffee at starbucks is ACTUALLY lyke omgah so much better than the one you make at home.